What Your Wife Wishes You Knew about Valentine’s Day (and Every Other Day of the Year)

Originally posted on Your Mom Has A Blog

Valentine’s Day is coming.  And, it has exploded into every grocery store, convenience store, and drug store in America.  It’s almost as if you’re assaulted by red and white singing lace trimmed hearts and hundreds of pink foil balloons every place you go.  The day is highly commercialized.  It’s a little corny.  ESPN has even been running a ridiculous ad for 4 foot tall teddy bears for several weeks.

You may hate Valentine’s Day.  You may resent the fact that “they” try to tell you when you should romance your wife.  You may tell yourself that you are romantic all year long, and you don’t need Hallmark telling you when to do so.  Your wife may even join in on the scoffing and nay-saying about Cupid’s big day.  But, can I tell you a secret?

She is just dying for you to make a big deal about her on Valentine’s Day.

Yes, it’s true.  And, it’s not just because it’s the “day of love.”  She wants you to romance her because it’s her dream for you to take EVERY opportunity (especially a day specifically set aside for celebrating love) to romance her and tell her what she means to you.  She wants to know that you still adore her the way you did back when your love was fresh and exciting and new, back when you wrote letters, back when you leaned over to whisper something sweet in her ear while you were at dinner.  She needs to know that you are more than willing to show her, on Valentine’s Day and on plenty of other days, that you  are still just as amazed by her, just as infatuated, just as engrossed in your relationship as you were way back when.


I’m not talking about spending a bunch of money (although if you want to do that, I doubt you’ll hear complaints).  I’m talking about taking time to do something personal and special for your wife.  Write her a love note.  Tell the world how thankful you are for her.  Buy her a flower.  Pick up her favorite coffee.

Whatever you do, DO NOT refuse to do anything at all.  Even if your wife never complains about it, even if she doesn’t seem upset, even if she tells you not to do anything, please hear me when I say she is terribly hurt when you ignore her on Valentine’s Day.  Sure, it may be corny.  But, can I tell you something?  All of the girls who will be getting four foot tall teddy bears on Saturday will know beyond any doubt that they are loved.  Even if they have no clue what they’ll do with a four foot tall teddy bear.

I often hear married men complain that their wives aren’t interested in sex anymore.  Think back to the days when she couldn’t keep her hands off of you.  How were you treating her, on Valentine’s Day and the whole rest of the year?  Chances are you were taking time to make her feel special, treasured, and loved in all kinds of big and small ways.

Don’t neglect your wife on Valentine’s Day.  Show her what she means to you.  Pick out the biggest card at WalMart.  Sing her a song.  Get down on one knee and relive your proposal.  Just do something, fellas.  Your marriage will be better for it.

If your wife were here, she’d probably say, Oh, don’t worry about it.  I don’t need for you to do anything.  Lies.  Trust me.  She needs you.  She needs your love and your reassurance.  She needs to hear you say it.  Or sing it.  Or whisper it in the middle of a crowded restaurant.  You won’t regret any day of year that you loved your wife well.  Happy Valentine’s Day.


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